


Wining and Dining

by InkwellSelkie



Category: Food Fantasy (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Established Relationship, F/F, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, happy pride month!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-12 05:25:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19222489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkwellSelkie/pseuds/InkwellSelkie
Summary: Two femme sweethearts pull a dine & dash and get beat up by the restaurant staff.





	Wining and Dining

The restaurant was a nicer one, right on the edge of town and fairly small but tidy and tastefully decorated. The Princess smoothed down her plushy pink skirts as she took the seat her girlfriend pulled out for her and smiled back at her. They usually went on more casual dates like walks in the park or going to see plays, or just straight up making out in the Delinquent's car for an hour, and though those were infinitely fun, she appreciated that the Delinquent was making more of an effort to suit her tastes.

"So as I was saying on the drive, as much of a cinematic masterpiece  _Labyrinth_ was," she crooned as she lay back in her own seat, legs spread, shades pushed up on her forehead. "It doesn't hold a candle to the absolute smokeshow that is  _Asterix et Obelix: Mission Cleopatre,_ and that's not an opinion, it's just fact."

Shaking her head at her girlfriend's idiotic antics, the Princess corrected her. "That's entirely untrue. Sure,  _Mission Cleopatre_ may have had horrible effects and an unsubtly homoerotic elevator scene, but what did it contribute to the betterment of society?  _Labyrinth_ gave us Areaology, an entire religion centred around David Bowie's crotch. I think human civilisation really needed that."

"Please, like there weren't already people worshipping it."

She shrugged, begrudgingly accepting that. Their waitress pranced up to the table, a Food Soul by the looks of it, taking the form of a young  teenage girl with honey-gold spiralling ponytails and a skirt that flounced around her, adorned with glimmering jewels that made the Princess's eyes sparkle.

"Good afternoon, my name is Mango Pudding, and I'll be your server," she recited in a voice that sounded big and brash and frustrated with servitude. "Are you ready to order?"

The Delinquent glanced at her girlfriend, who shrugged, and picked up the menu for the first time since arriving.

~~"Yeah uh can I get a fuckin uuuhhhhh uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh burger?"~~

"Uh, could we get a couple of strawberry milkshakes and an order of -umm- Mushroom Alfredo?" she asked, passing her the menu as if she would a joint or something. I don't know, it's just like, that casual flip in her direction for her to take herself, you know?

Mango Pudding wrote down the order on a notebook and took the menus, stalking back to the kitchen.

The Delinquent took the brief moment of silence to take out a compact mirror and fix her lipstick, a little bit smudged from the fight she'd gotten into before picking up the Princess for their date. Her girlfriend raised her eyebrow cockily across the table. "I didn't know you liked-"

"I don't, it sounded fancy so I thought you'd like it."

"That's what I thought. And I do."

Mango Pudding came back with their meal in a few minutes. Great service really. They ate mostly in silence, relishing in the wonderful texture and aroma of the dish, savouring gooey cheese and perfectly spiced mushrooms. It was delicious.

She returned with the bill later as they were finishing up the sweet pink milkshakes. The Delinquent took one look at it and blanched.

"Hey babe, guess what?"

"Oh no."

"Oh yeah."

They stared at each other for a second and then darted up, bolting for the door as fast as possible. Hey, maybe this time they'd  _actually_ manage to get away!

All of a sudden, a group of Food Souls blocked the door, each one imposing in a different way, but all of their eyes burning with the same fire, the same hunger and thirst for vengeance that was about to be totally fucking quenched with the most righteous of beverages.

"This was a horrible idea and I hate you."

"Love you too."


End file.
